"Tell Me Why" by Wynonna Judd

1993 / #77

Rate Your Music score: 3.34 out of 5!

Is it possible to drive into a fart?

Discuss.

Either way, the answer will upend some of the pseudoscience we've seen over the past few years, but let's make the case for each side of the great debate. You might think that if you fart in a moving vehicle, the cloud of flatulence will somehow move with the vehicle and stink it up for miles to come. It's like how if you place a coin on your knee on a free fall ride at an amusement park, the coin is supposed to fly up and levitate at eye level while you fall.

It seems more logical though that the air biscuit would stay behind. If you're in a car and you smell a big, stinky fart, it would seem to be because you drove into it.

Whatever the weather, I remember hearing this lost hit on a day in which one of the above scenarios took place. This song was on the radio on the day we drove home from a college trip to New Orleans at the end of my freshman year.

The college folks kept saying that what happens in New Orleans stays in New Orleans. I take issue with that. They imposed this edict unilaterally and expected me to follow it without agreeing to it. But I would have respected it if they hadn't become such condescending tyrants later. When they weren't throwing tantrums, they were talking down to you. Sad how they bullied people in this manner. For another thing, this story is about what happened on the way home, not what happened in New Orleans.

We were zooming north on a rural Interstate when the unmistakable bouquet of a silent-but-deadly filled the van. People poked their heads into the front seat to comment on it. Nobody could be indicted, but it was suggested that we make a pit stop soon. The bunker blasts took place repeatedly over many miles.

And "Tell Me Why" brings back fond memories of that day!

What a fine way to cap off freshman year! It's a shame more recent students didn't get to make great memories like this. For example, the university canceled spring break in 2021 just to keep a tighter rein on students. But I checked some Hot 100 charts from early 2021, and it looks like they were lucky not to be stuck with the music of 2021 on a long trip.